lilly0 (lilly0) wrote,

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Bittersweet Symphony Chapter 1

Title: Bittersweet Symphony: Chapter 1: Scars of the past
Pairing: Main: RyoJin, And: Akame, TomaPi, Uchi/Miyao, one-sided RyoDa, PiKame, will also include MatsuJun and Takki and some other guys
Rating:  R
Genre: romance, angst, friendship
Summary: Jin and Ryo are best friends... with a strange agreement between them: Once in a while they find themselves making out with each other. While Jin doesn't see it as something serious, Ryo's heart is already attached to the other...
Jin's world goes upside down when Kame suddenly calls him (--> happens in the drabble, please read my  NOTE for explanation!), telling him the reason for their broken friendship. Since Jin wonders what to do now, Ryo's world breaks down...
When Yamapi wants to visit Ryo, he sees something unbelievable. And Kame finds himself all heart-broken and sad, until there is a knock at the door...
(TomaPi, UchiMiyao will come with the next two chapters. Same for RyoDa)

NOTE: I wrote this drabble HERE some time ago, some of you asked me to write a sequel to it... Here it is^^

Disclaimer: I don't own them or anything else JE-related, but the story is mine of course^^

"Something important?“ Ryo asked when he came back into the living room, sitting down next to Jin. He handed him a glass of Whisky, while sipping at his own glass. Jin smiled at him. Ryo’s presence was soothing like nothing else was. He bent over a bit, stroking over Ryo’s face, curling his hair between his fingers.

Ryo grinned, when he felt some pressure on his hair as Jin was pulling him nearer, giving him a wet Whisky-kiss. Ryo laughed a bit, grabbing Jin’s cheeks and pulling him into a heated kiss. He sighed when he felt Jin’s fingers on his stomach, stroking him there while nibbling at his neck. Jin gripped Ryo’s hips, pulling him on his lap.

Ryo blushed slightly. Sitting on a guy’s lap was still feeling so strange… and it didn’t make it better that this guy was Jin… He and Jin had a strange arrangement, whenever one of them felt like needing some closeness… out of loneliness, or whatever… he called the other. You could put it like this: They were best friends… who were making out with each other sometimes. But no sex! Just a bit kissing and fumbling…

Jin playfully bit into Ryo’s neck, sucking and licking at it. His hands were already moving down to Ryo’s pants, pushing the line between what the both of them called having some fun and a serious making out, a wave of lust rushing through his body… when his glance suddenly fell on a picture of him and Kame in Junior days… right on the cupboard in front of him…

“What?” Ryo mumbled, immediately sensing Jin’s absence.

“Sorry.” Jin mumbled, hugging Ryo tightly and placing a kiss on his ear. “I’m so sorry.”

Ryo blinked at him in disbelief. “You don’t want to?”

“I’m sorry.” Jin repeated.

Ryo blushed a bit over the awkwardness and embarrassment that was lying over them now. “It was your idea.” He breathed out. “You called me today and begged me to drop by.”

“I know.” Jin nuzzled his nose into Ryo’s hair. “I’m so sorry… It’s just that…”


“Kame called me right before and told me he loves me.” Jin explained simply.

Ryo sighed, robbing down from Jin’s lap and falling on the sofa again. Lust-killer. Definitely. Jin looked at Ryo sheepishly. “Are you mad now.”

“Well…” Ryo mumbled grumpily. “I’m not exactly thrilled.” Then he forced a smile on his lips, ignoring the painful stitching in his stomach now. “But it’s okay.” 

Jin looked at him piercingly, his eyes scanning the other guy. Just at the moment when Ryo thought he couldn’t keep his smile any longer, Jin looked away again, apparently feeling relieved. The moment Jin had turned away again, Ryo’s smile broke from his face, disappearing like a flash. “What do you want to do now?” he asked, trying to keep his voice straight… not letting it break over these words.

“I’m not sure.” Jin smiled wryly. “It’s new… you know. All these years I wondered why Kame and I were drifting apart and now he calls me… and… the reason is…THIS.”

“You plan to think your options through?” Ryo coughed a bit.

“I’m not sure about what exactly I feel for him.” Jin mused.

Till this point Ryo had been able to keep it, but now he could already feel how his self-control was slipping away. He stood up. “Maybe I should leave?”

“What? Why don’t you stay? We could watch some movies.” Jin stared at the other in surprise, slightly wondering where Ryo’s awkwardness came from. He pulled at the other’s sleeve playfully, trying to loosen Ryo’s expression. “Stop being so strange… You are mad right?”

Ryo shook his head. Damn Jin for not letting him escape the situation and for his strong instincts to sense immediately when something was wrong. The desperation was nagging at every part of his body now. “I have a lot of work at home… I should really go.”

“But you are already here.” Jin argued, not wanting to let Ryo go that easily. Ryo was like fresh air to him, he needed him to be able to breathe properly.

“Because you called me.” Ryo didn’t dare to look at Jin directly, cursing himself for not being able to fight Jin in any way. “But I really should go home and work a bit.”

Jin looked at him grumpily, nearly hurt. “I don’t only want you around for making out or fumbling! I thought you know that…”

Ryo rolled his eyes a bit, trying to sound amused and not sad. “I know that, idiot… Let’s meet this week for lunch, alright?” As Jin wanted to intervene and push the situation further, Ryo interrupted him. “Just let me go!” he begged.

He sighed in relief when he was finally running through the corridor, down the stairs, rushing out of the apartment house Jin lived in. The moment the cold air hit his face, he breathed in and out deeply, trying to sooth his tensed nerves, tears burning behind closed eyes.



If Kame had been supposed to describe his mood now, he would have said… gloomy. Really really gloomy. Had he really called Jin today and told him that he loved him… love… love… love… WAS HE STUPID or WHAT?


Kame jumped up and down like madly, tugging at his hair desperately. What was he thinking? Why did he even call Jin? After all this time… And just because Junno had started to reminiscence about old times, telling them how he had met Jin last week. With that Junno had started a vicious circle: Everyone suddenly wanted to tell some anecdotes and stories about ‘before’. When they were still Juniors and innocent and dorky and getting along well.

Most of these stories were about things Kame did… together with Jin, like hiding their Senpai’s shoes or messing up while background dancing… or cuddling together while falling asleep backstage during one of Takki’s concerts…

“And now you don’t even talk to each other…” Nakamaru had said this softly, not meaning to hurt Kame. His voice just sounded a bit confused, wondering about how paths that were similar once suddenly differed with time and how people who were close, suddenly grew apart.

It had stirred something in Kame and suddenly he was feeling sad… lonely… The times when he had been still close to Jin were so far away… like another world. When was the last time that Jin had called him just to chat with him? When was the last time that Jin had laughed only for him? When was the last time that Jin had invited him to his apartment for a movie night? When was the last time Jin had hugged him out of the blue? When was the last time Jin had stroked through his hair? When was the last time that Jin had twinkled towards him, because he was feeling annoyed when Ueda and Koki were fighting? When was the last time that Jin had intervened into a fight just because someone was going against Kame? When was the last time that Jin had shown him a bright, true smile? Only for him…

Kame couldn’t remember…  He couldn’t even recall Jin’s smile… his real smile, not just a smirk, no, his rare, shiny and bright smile with which he could spread so much warmth…

Kame looked down at the floor. How do you handle loneliness? Want? A broken friendship? Regret?

These were basically the reasons why Kame had called Jin… telling him the one and only reason for everything straight into his face. Well of course not ‘straight into his face’ because they were just talking on the phone… but it was still straight enough.

Kame sighed when he heard a knock on the door. Why was there even anyone bothering him right now? He wanted to be alone and sulk and cry and be all heart-broken and sorrowful.

“Jin…” he mumbled in shock when he opened the door.





“Ryo-chan? Why don’t you answer your phone? I know you are at home…” Pi knocked at Ryo’s door, already feeling quite impatient. Jin had called him around two hours ago, telling him that Ryo had been totally awkward when they had met… absent-minded and stressed. And Pi was immediately feeling concerned too. Jin’s description sounded so bad… what if Ryo had a breakdown again? Pi remembered the last time Ryo was acting all stressed and absent-minded… two weeks later he fainted during one of their rehearsals. And from that day on, Pi had decided to definitely look after Ryo… no matter what. He grinned a bit as a thought hit him. Right. Because of that reason he even had a key to Ryo’s apartment.

Pi was actually really feeling proud about himself in that matter. Getting Ryo’s key was not the easiest thing to achieve. Of course not. Ryo had been all stubborn and moody, telling him that he didn’t need a babysitter. But Pi was determined… and calm… In the end his quiet way of explaining everything to Ryo, promising him to also give him a key to Pi’s apartment, because one never knew what might happen… this had led to the small, bronze-coloured key in his hand.

“Ryo-chan?” Pi walked into Ryo’s apartment, looking around everywhere. His eyes scanned the living room… suddenly realising a shadow on the floor. For a moment everything around him got blur… the noise from the street outside seemed to be so far away… he could hear his own breath and his heart-beat in his ear… his heart loudly hammering against his chest… Pi tried to move, setting one of his feet into the right direction, but it was like in a nightmare, he wasn’t even able to raise a hand, no voice escaping his mouth. Running without moving. He wasn’t sure how long he was standing there without moving, not being able to do anything, but suddenly reality hit him again, as if the forward button on a DVD player was pressed. “RYO!” he yelled, running towards the body on the floor, knocking down a vase and the small table in front of Ryo’s TV and stumbling over Ryo’s shoes. He knelt down next to his friend, taking his hand. He looked around desperately, finally seeing a half-empty glass of water and a small package with meds next to it. He breathed in loudly, his eyes widening in shock. He stroked over Ryo’s hair, his fingertips touching the other’s face and too pale skin. “Damn!” Pi yelled, getting up immediately. What was he supposed to do now? What did they learn during their first aid class… He should definitely call the ambulance first.


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